Lazy?

Few things are as irritable as getting up on a Monday morning, especially for someone who uses 5 alarms to try to get up at 8’o clock¹. Ever since I passed out of college, I’ve been facing this problem. Umm. Correction. I’ve been facing this problem since my fourth year in college. For the first three years, I had a wonderful roomie who never failed to wake me up². Ah, those were the days. I was able to get up in the evening, completely bypassing odd times such as mornings and afternoons. Gosh, nobody found it odd when a fellow hosteller walked out of his room in the evening with a tooth brush in hand³.

Let me make another modification to my original sentence. Few things are as irritable as getting up hungry on a Monday morning, especially for someone who uses 5 alarms to try to get up at 8’o clock.

When I was in college, there were options aplenty. A wide number of breakfast varieties⁴ were offered by the college canteens. Some of the early-goers among my friends had the foresight and camaraderie to pre-order items. There were times when time spent in canteens was greater than that in classrooms.

Even when I was working in Gurgaon, breakfast was never a problem. The office canteen, if one could call it that, served breakfast. Even when it was not to your liking, or sold out before you reach office, the omnipresent samosas⁵ were there to save your day. Enough has been said about this canteen in my earlier post titled UpmA. But I liked it, really. You could say that aloo paratha with curd was my favourite⁶.

But now, where do I find myself? I’m supposed to cook my own breakfast? Fat chance. I would rather go hungry than deviate from being my normal self. Wait. Going hungry is not a pleasing prospect either. It is, in fact, slightly worse than eating what I cook⁷.

…

I can go on pouring out my thoughts like this and all of it would add to your conviction that I’m perhaps one of the laziest person you’ve ever known⁸. You couldn’t be more wrong. Yes, Ladies and gentlemen! I’ve lately realized that I’m not lazy at all. I simply strive to be more efficient.

Did you know that there is just a thin line between laziness and efficiency⁹? Given a set of options, a lazy person would choose the shortest path. Wouldn’t an efficient person do just the same?

I’d leave you with that¹⁰.

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¹ To all avid followers of my blog: No, this is not a repetition. Notice the italicized word. Now that winter is almost here, Monday morning syndrome is getting worse.

² By usage of mild violence on the rare occasions when he got up before me and on other times, disturbing my sleep in the first place by snoring like a.. er.. couldn’t find anything equal to that.

³ I don’t know about others, but where I studied, such things were commonplace. The behaviour was especially pronounced during exam times – the biological clocks went haywire.

⁴ Odd that I find it so now. I used to grumble about lack of varieties then.

⁵ Couldn’t resist an attempt to define samosa. Oil-fried pastry with spiced vegetable fillings? Nah, doesn’t sound good enough. Reminder to self: Ask a known definition expert.

⁶ I vouched for it even when the curd became buttermilk and the paratha became thinner than roti. I eventually gave up when buttermilk quality steadily deteriorated and inevitably turned into water.

⁷ Don’t underestimate my culinary skills because I say this. My kitchen products are best served hot. Or rather, must served hot.

8 Ardent readers of my blog would’ve surely guessed by now where I’m going with this.

⁹ If you are capable of believing one liners such as ‘There is a thin line between good and evil/genius and madness/love and hate/etc’, you should believe this too. Even if you don’t believe in those, you should believe this.

10 If you’re concerned that I didn’t quite finish where I was going with the breakfast thing: I support fruits for breakfast. You know, healthy, natural, nutritious, balanced diet, vegan and so on. As an aside: it’s ready-to-eat.

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